Showing posts with label Illinois Trip. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Illinois Trip. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Journey Part II

Part II—
My knee had not given me trouble until Thursday night. We were praying for one of our team (all of us circled around her) when one girl stood up, tripped over my foot, and fell on my knee with most of her weight. Yeah. I don’t think I screamed, but I sure felt like it. I kept it elevated and took pain medicine…and prayer. Babying it kept me in fine shape for the rest of the trip. God was good!

We worked through the material slowly. On Thursday, the material about the Day of Delight was on page 91 onward. We were then around page 32. Our leader said that (technically) we should be doing it faster, but it did not matter. Instead of flipping pages, we were really cleaning our hearts. Times of discussion about the course material would turn into times of questions, and times of confession of sin, and times of prayer for one another. One by one, we stripped off part, and then all of our various masks. ( the “Perfect ATI girl” mask, and the “Holy and Spiritual Christian” mask, and the “I Am So Strong” mask…to name a few) On Friday, the beloved visionary of our team lead us in a time of confessing the various iniquities that our families passed down to us, and other sins that we had ignored, or buried, or refused to confess. During the week, as we listened to speakers, or as we read through the course material, different areas of my “heart” would begin aching, or throbbing. It was the strangest sensation. Almost as if God was touching the sin-stained area and scrubbing away all the filth. By Friday, I had dealt with a lot of the larger issues either privately with God, or during our study of the different “bad hearts”. However, I could still feel areas that were dirty. As we confessed to one-another, we all broke out in tears. We all got on our knees (some of us on our faces) and we cried out to God for forgiveness and cleansing. We prayed “in one-accord” for about two hours. We prayed for eachother, for our families, for our nation, for others, for a sudden, painful attack of TMJ that hit our visionary sister (as we prayed the pain subsided), and our own sin-stained hearts. I have never known 10 strangers so well as I did those girls. In those hours of prayer and couple hours of confession, we became a family. We could say anything. Our deepest darkest secrets and sins. It was so freeing. We loved and were loved with forgiveness from God and eachother. I arose from there with a perfectly clean heart. It was the strangest feeling in the entire world. To be empty inside. To not feel angry or guilty or hurt. Things that have happened to me, people who have hurt me, I still remember those events, but God (in His awesome and overwhelming Grace) took away the pain. I can acknowledge the damaging things that they did to me, but those events no longer hold me captive.
Lest you should think I now am perfect, please do not presume. I did get angry at someone just the next day for not being considerate about my knee. Anger and nasty comments poured out of my mouth. Then it came to me: “…Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” I suddenly stopped in my tracks. Here my new heart was filled with anger. I had to completely stop and ask God for forgiveness. I am still a sinner. My mind would still like to get up on the throne and tell me what is good for me. Tell me what I deserve. Tell me my rights have been trampled on. It is astounding to me to see how many times I need to re-clean out my heart. I have found though, that although I am a sinner, I now much more in tune with what is going on in my heart. I can understand why I am angry and give my expectations to God. I can stop it before it turns to bitterness. It is wonderful.

Journey Part III

Part III—
Saturday was our “sleep in” day. I was sick. I finally found the strength to get up at about 9 in the morning. I was ready, however, when the breakfast van came by, which some of us hadn’t taken showers yet, or were in the middle of one. (yikes)
I find it amazing. Almost all of us girls came with some measure of trepidation about “perfect ATI girls” or just “girls” in particular. I was not looking forward to having to explain being an MK to a bunch of “wow, I care SOOO much” homeschoolers....who would all have wonderful Gothard families and look like all-American-girl dolls.
Yet, each of us eventually let down our barriers, and we realized that we all had the same fear of eachother....and IT WASN’T TRUE!!
Good is just amazing!!
Well, Saturday we finished up a “personality test” DVD that we had begun watching during the week, and did some tests to determine “love language” and then we went to Bond Falls. Bond Falls is not as amazing as some waterfalls I have been to, but it is lovely to be sure. However, it has some nasty terrain!! My knee worked through it slowly, and by the grace of God I did not die from drinking stream water (thank you Dearest for the pain pills) or from falling/slipping/etc which was a dire possibility.
Got some lovely pictures!
That night we asked if any of the other teams had experienced the same as we did, and we were told some of the info I wrote above, and other things. We all felt very burdened for the other teams, and decided to wake up early to pray for them.

Sunday we woke up around 4:30 in the morning. Yes, 4 AM. We cleaned the gatehouse from cellar to dome (neither of which it had, but the thought counts), and prayed for the other teams, and spent some last moments in our lovely home before rushing to eat and rushing to leave. We drove back to Hinsdale, and I slept most of the time...at least that is how it felt. I honestly don’t remember...so I must have been asleep. Most of the time I was awake I was ruminating over what to share as a testimony (Mr. Gothard loves testimonies) and praying for the other teams. Our visionary sister was given a dream/vision (burden) for (a) girl or girls who had still not confessed or dealt with things. She saw them halfway between the platform (to give their testimony) and the door (to leave without changing) and it really weighed on her. We all prayed right outside the door to the Staff Meeting room, and Libby asked Mr. Gothard if we could recite I Cor which we had memorized. We had planned on being the first ones to give testimonies, but two other girls stood up almost right away and said a few short words. We arranged ourselves in verse order and gave testimonies in reverse-verse order because we got mixed up. It was interesting how we were (I think) the only group to all give testimonies. I had written out a slew of ideas and things to say, and had written out 5 pages of thoughts. I ended up sharing very little of any of that. What I did say I felt (afterwards) could have been better, or more of this-or-that, or more moving, or more about specific things that helped me....but everyone said that I said what was “me” and that it had been really good. In fact, most of the girls felt that they did not say what they had planned, or felt that their testimonies were lacking....but we all agreed that they had been very good, very helpful and right on the mark. That is when amazing visionary said “Hey, girls, remember we were praying that the Spirit would speak through us...His words and not our own? That is what happened....” We did not give or say what we had wanted/thought with our feeble intellects was the best, or most holy or most hard-hitting thing, but we were His vessels, and we spoke His words. When we all finished, and we recited our 3 verses, the line for testimonies had tripled, and four girls had come up to our visionary and said “Was it me? Because I felt you were talking to me.” She said that she did not know who it was, but that God was the one working and God had given her the burden. She prayed with each of them, and she said that once she had given her testimony, she felt the burden lifted. Not that there was no need for those 4 girls, but that it was not her burden anymore, but God’s. God had given it to her, and she had used it, and now it was up to Him again.
Testimonies continued until lunch break on Monday. Mr. Gothard said (at least a half-dozen times) that he had never heard a Journey with such powerful testimonies. Libby told us a couple times that he was being truthful about it too. She said some Journeys came and went with only a couple testimonies, or testimonies about water-tubing instead of sin-confessing. Nearly every team had two or three girls speak, and about 3 teams had most (or all?) of their girls say something.
Monday was a mixture of speakers and sessions about different things. It was definitely a trying day for me as I struggled with dashed hopes in an area, and disappointment, and my expectations of certain people (I thought they promised something, but they never fulfilled what they said) made me hold a grudge. Tuesday I was hit by such an attack that I could not move from the couch. I said some rather angry and depressing and hurt things. In fact, I was powerless until two girls finally got down beside me and prayed. Then I suddenly realized what I was doing (holding a grudge of expectations, being depressed). I was able (after they prayed) to see what was going on. I rebuked Satan for poisoning my mind, and I prayed and forgave the people for not following through, and I gave God my expectations. Afterwards I was my cheerful self again, and I was definitely scared again by what was going on. This spiritual-warfare stuff is freaky, guys!!
Tuesday right after lunch I was driven to the train station, where after a few hugs and a prayer, I boarded the Metra and headed away to Chicago. Once there, I got my tickets paid for (staying an extra day was a blessing, although an expensive one), I was able to check in my big bag, and I headed out into the Windy City to see some sights before 6pm.

As I was meandering outside Union Station, I was once again accosted (not in a bad sense) by a “black angel” as I had begun calling them. Seriously. Random black guys with a degree of ragged clothing who know directions to everywhere and are more than willing to help you. Anyway, this one was selling newspapers and I didn’t have any spare change, so we just traded information. (Note: in Chicago, people who are used to walking tend to underestimate distances) He told me that Pacific Garden Mission (home of “Unshackled” Radio programs) was about 4 blocks down from the station. I had wanted to go there/visit/have a tour, so I headed off and walked four blocks. I had to ask a lady in a store then, because I was told “you can’t miss it”. She said it was down four MORE blocks....which was more like 6 and a half. BUT ANYWAY, I got there and a very active and cheerful lady (I believe the only white lady in the entire building) gave me a personal and interesting tour. She loved the fact that I used to listen to “Unshackled” in the Philippines, and even walked me to the bus stop two and a half blocks away. Then, a very trendily dressed white lady helped me get directions to Chicago and LaSalle street by the subway, and I then (with directions from another black angel) headed down about 4 blocks to Moody Bible Institute Campus, where I spent about an hour with a friend. Yes, my knee was not very happy, but I was able to sit down for a part of that time. Interesting thing, though, was that my shoulder actually hurt a LOT more than my knee. Lugging around books and all the extra weight over 50lbs from your big suitcase is NOT something I would suggest to any compadres on a walking tour.

SO, I got back to Union Station right around 6pm when the sun was setting, and I wandered around the food court for some time trying to find a cheap, yet tasteful sustenance besides the water and chips that I had stashed in my bag. The Pitts station sure doesn’t have any available food, and I would need something before my 19 hour trip was over. I finally picked up some bread sticks from the little Pizza Hut, and boarded the train just as it was announced for boarding. While the train from Pitts to Chicago was mostly empty, the train from Chicago to Pitts (to Washington DC, actually) was reserved seating only. I had a seatmate, but I was so tired that I fell asleep almost right away. It was a little less cold with a packed train, and I had on extra layers, but sleeping in a small seat is always uncomfortable. My neck was all cramped up when we got to Pitts at 5 in the morning. I then wrote in my Journey Journal until 7am when the train to Harrisburg came ready. I was able to get a row of seats, but my things also cramped me...and I slept there again (Note: Dear readers—never set good intentions when you travel). I woke up about 30 minutes away and my shoulder finally stopped being numb from carrying my huge bag and sleeping in a twisted up position....ouch.
It was good to get pushed and pulled in every direction my silly siblings when I got out to the car, and to hear their chatter and find out about all the new scrapes and bumps and bruises they had received since I was gone. I had intended to sleep and unpack, but as life in this family would go—my grandparents on my mothers side were driving up from Virginia the next day and food and a room had to be prepared for them...as well as all the chores that had fallen by the wayside when I was not there to do them....
That night I stayed up until 1:30 in the morning trying to figure out whether I wanted to be involved in a drama camp in the area, and figuring out details to a TeenPact alumni event.
Thursday we all went out (missing the first Square Dance Practice of the season) to audition, chess class and a Constitution Class. We got home about 10 minutes before the Grandparents walked in the door. I was then up until about 12:30 typing out the beginnings of this whole thingymabobber.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Friday, August 24, 2007

The Illinois Trip 1

(For conveniant reading, I have posted these in 'backwards' order...you don't have too keep on going down, and then back up, and then down again.)

Well, we were gone for 9 days, and 12 + hours.

It was a time of spiritual meditation, and closeness with God. Death was a constant theme....especially at speeds far exceeding 85 mph!!!!!!!!

The overall trip was good...or at the least OK....that is, not considering the open hospitality, free room and board, good meals, fun games, delighting companionship, hospitality, big fat blankets, friendship, fellowship, good singing, encouragement, constant exercise (hem*), and love extended to us by the E* family. Needless to say, the floor was wonderful, and the dog-house was roomy enough!!!

We stopped by the J's house on Tue. night, and spent a couple hours making jokes, looking through photo albums, and talking about things until everyone was SO exhausted that they HAD to go to bed.
Everyone except David got up early, and I made a big hot breakfast. ;) We walked around, took pictures, and had to pull ourselves away...but we finally got on the road to IL.

We crossed the timezone, and the border after an extended period of time, and then enjoyed ourselves gaping at the city like some fresh-from-the-country tourists, and took a couple dozen pictures.

At the E's our dearest hostess fed us and gave us a grand tour of her house, and showed the staff to their rooms. We two then ordered a cup of tea and chatted for some time before turning out the lights.....(*HEM*). However, I was taught the grand and strategical game of Catan, but was not able to finish it.

I fell asleep before being rudely awakened by two giggling girls turning on the lights, walking on me, jumping on and off beds like hyperactive puppies, playing youtube songs, and on the whole acting rather shamefully for the late hours they had been keeping.

The Illinois Trip 2

Thursday, the 16th, I was awakened, with no thought as to the horror I had endured the night before, at the absurd hour of 7:30. I was rushed about to get dressed and ready, as we would be leaving VERY soon. However, at 9:15, when the first party arrived at the Metra station, the train waved goodbye to us, and we girls decided to weary ourselves early by touring the prestigious village of L____ville.

Once our party arrived, I shot pictures and we all got situated in the train. At the great and legendary Windy City, we walked for hours and took many pictures, as well as many turns carrying about 50 lb. of backpack full of a great lunch. We spent some time at Millenium Park, took a full turn around the Navy Pier, and then suroy-ed the Chicago Cultural Center.
Afterwards, I went home with Mr. E*, and the two younger boys, while BJ, DK, and our hostess spent the rest of the day (and a good bit of the night) in the Art Museum.

The Illinois Trip 3

Friday, after a time of singing and praying, I went along to an American Mall, and took pictures of my two lovely companions in evening gowns. I then treated them to lunch, and bought their favorite dress, which they wore to the White House for the official MK Awareness Luncheon with the President. (yeah...you better believe it).
We were then abandoned with a stomach full of Pizza to sit in front of the TV and watch a horror movie about Antarctica. Ruthanna was very sweet and brought my shivering sister and I two blankets, which helped us survive the peril. After that, I watched National Treasure with the two youngest boys and retired at about 11 PM.

Saturday, I went up to Wisconsin with the maid and my good friend Matthew, to spend a fun, albeit a bit windy hour along the beach front of Simmons Island. We came home and spent an afternoon lazing around, and the night taking interesting pictures of our hostess.

The Illinois Trip 4

Sunday, the 19th, we wttended a sermon-and-singing-time at a designated place of meeting, after which we ate hamburgers and potato chips inside because it was raining steadily. Having gulped down our food, we rushed home only to go out again, and tour the campus of the school our hostess was set to attend.
At about 3 PM, everyone went home except for her and the maid, and I played a 'real' game of Catan, and tied for second....even if I DID have my best numbers as a two and a three. I also created a new reasource, or at least re-named one. That night, we also all enjoyed an African movie.....or at least on ABOUT Africa....to an extent....which our Muslim-Culture audience seemed to enjoy.

Monday, I spent the entire day with BJ. We visited two colleges of renown, the center of the ministry that introduced my father to homeschooling, and the house a friend. At said last port of call, we spent more time than planned, because our car mysteriously and with great evil in it's heart, died, and had to be jump-started.
Once said evil car was grudginly working, we returned to the E's and faced the wrath of said car's owner, and I went to bed....at 3 AM....after wrestling with another evil-at-heart peice of machinery which refused to download pictures. It won, and I have since...yes, I admit my sin...harbored evil thoughts towards it, and planned intricate tortures for it should it fall into my hands.

The Illinois Trip 5

Tuesday, we took a sad departure from the lovely quarters we had enjoyed for so long, and drove many long hours south towards Kentucky. Our left, front tire saw fit to loose most of it's unfortunate life's-breath about 2/3 of the way there, and we spent prescious time waiting for it to be fixed. Arriving at our destination, we were precariously close to closing time, and didn't really want to rush through.
God provided a host family not more than 30 min. away who were more than glad to have us over at the spur of the moment. We enjoyed many jokes, good pizza, a dumb TV show (wink*), and some intellectual debate until midnight, at which all who were left awake went to bed.

The next morning we spent as long as we wanted touring the Creation Museum, and really enjoyed it. It was VERY well presented, and the shows were really memorable. We got to be part of a photo shoot, and enjoyed the funny signs....like "Out of Order- we live in a fallen world" or "Creation still in progress" or "Thou Shalt not Touch!".

We set off past noon, and arrived home very exhausted, grumpy, and tired. However, we did try to have fun, and we learned how to work together with people in less-than-medically-well-for-you personal space, and loads of baggage which hampered movement.

It was OK......yeah....it was good! :)

Saturday, August 18, 2007

SO....

I have now been to Wisconsin!!



.....and Illinois....



.....and Indiana...